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I'M NOBODY BUY MYSELF
I published this book in 2004. It was my very first full book publication with illustrations. To be completely honest, while I appreciate it for its beginning, for the courage it took to put it out there.... for the secrets that it unveiled and unraveled with its publication... so, I wouldn't say it is my favorite but I love to look back at it just to see how far I've come. This book was published when my oldest son was two years old.
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I'm Nobody But Myself, is of one person's life, but many will find similarities in their own life. The author, Kourtnee D. Scriminger, has put together the best of her poems and writings. It's what she believes in, what she questions, wonders and walks in circles about. Topics include; her childhood, family, love and relationships, dreams, nightmares and death, the world around us, past, present and future, inspiration and motherhood.
She hopes that every person from teens to adults will take at least one thought from this book and apply it to their own life. Each person in this world is an individual. It could be from events in your past or maybe it's the way you question life and the world around you.
This is not a guidebook or instructional book. This is a free reading, mind-opening collection. You can take what you want and walk away, while others may savor the thoughts they can associate with their own lives and futures. Remember being nobody but yourself is the best way to be!
Little Train
I published this book in 2007. It is the only (under 8 years old) children's book that I have ever published. I have written two other children's books, but I never finished the illustrations. My boys had a great fascination with trains. They loved playing with them. So it wasn't hard to come up with the idea, illustrations colors, and added benefit of learning and reading. This book was published when my youngest was two years old.
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C.A.T. (Caring Always Teaches) Series Book. Taking 5 minutes to read to your child, shows them you care. And in those 5 minutes of caring you can teach them to: read, Write Imagine and so much more.
I designed this book to be quick and easy to read. I've made it easily manageable into any busy schedule. Plus, simple enough for children to learn to read. it also incorporates at least one other learning aspect within its pages. I've used bold basic colors, with simple and creative images to entice the littlest readers to come back for more! I hope you and your young readers enjoy it as much as my two little boys and I do!
The Protector. April 2008. BW sketch
I
Darkness has made its way back again and so have the demons and monsters some of us have been ignoring, hiding from or trying to shut away. But in every shadow, danger creeps and suspicion lingers...The things that were and have been...are still following you! And no matter how far you run or how strong your defensive, barricading walls are...you can’t get away!
All your worst fears come rushing back…flooding your mind…overwhelming you…drowning you. Slowly…slowly they begin to approach…inching closer and closer…you can feel the slightest breeze as they take swipe after swipe at you...
The returning darkness that you feel, is not unfamiliar, and reminds you once again that there is no escape, that they are real and that they do exist. They are making their way to you…to tear you piece by piece… each taking a turn…one by one… waiting for you to fall…
And now...they have you trapped…they begin to claw at your skin, sending shivers up your petrified body…they are so close that you can hear them hissing in your ear. They spin the world around you...Spinning, Swirling, Spinning...Confused and Dazed you start to tip and topple…you fall to your knees and your tears fall to the ground...
I I
Looking around, you search in desperation for help…and though there are some outreached helping hands...(of deception)...you know from experience, that they aren’t all trust worthy…but which one do you choose…think, THINK...now is not the time for guessing...if only because you don’t want to be wrong again! Determination growls from inside… NO you don’t need them…nothing and no one can be trusted, not anymore…you struggle to stay strong…to stand up and start again! But you can’t think clearly…not when there isn’t enough room to breathe…your scattered thoughts and uneasy emotions have you on a rollercoaster…you don’t need help…you never have…this isn’t the first time and it won’t be the last…and yet…your heart suggests you want to be rescued…and you want to be saved...but more importantly…you just want it all to end…
Their odorous, lingering breath swirls all around you...until at last you are nauseous...Their claws are sinking deeper and deeper beneath your skin...And you know you are screaming...as loud as you possible can…and yet, there is no sound...except the hissing in your ears. And with every whipping and beating against your skin...scrapping and digging of their claws...You can see nothing…NOTHING in the darkness - though you know it’s real because the pain is very real...and the blood runs down your arm...mixing with your tears.
But now…will this be your end…you are already down…and your mind…body…soul…won’t take anymore…just CAN’T take it anymore…your strength is bleeding...draining away...and you are sure that…they have won! You can’t do this anymore...and darkness becomes darker...you won’t...you can’t...fight it anymore…and now, you pray this isn’t how it ends…as you collapse…at last…limp on the cold damp ground…you are now dead to the world around you…
I I I
Suddenly, with a great SWISH, from wings that span at least ten feet each…the huddled mass of decomposing stench that was attempting to feed upon her fresh, warm body…are flung violently…skyward and backwards. He flew down...(from above)...his tail snapped like lightning in the air, and with a soft thud his feet landed on the ground. Standing majestically over her, with his dragon wings curved ‘round her…defensively shielding and…protecting her...
His eyes of stone silently stare at the ominous monsters…daring the venomous creatures…to deny him of his treasure…he justly stole back from them. They hiss and spit towards him…stomping and striking out at him…(but only in stupidity)…for while he stands guard...his tail lashes out at them…wrapping ‘bout their necks…strangling them…they whimper…begging to be released…and finally...when all was...what it would be...they were simply tossed aside…
You should not assume he is a monster…or even think of him as one…though part dragon…his soul and heart are very much human…he is the Protector...protector of one…of one who did not let him in…who could not let him in…even though he was right there…(always right there, in the shadows, at her side)...she did not want help, because of her fear…the fear that she could not trust again…he was hopeful that it was not too late...(maybe he should have...but he couldn’t have intervened)...and hopefully she had not waited…too long…before she finally…..FINALLY…let him in. He leaned over her motionless body…and gently brushed her face with his hand…it was still warm…
When all seemed calm for the moment…he gently lifted her body...carefully...up off the ground…and with ease and smoothness…his wings lifted them up…soaring straight into the air. He held her tight…secure and protected…up above the darkness they rose…up above the shadows and the fears…up above the existence that she lived in…up above the world so high…to rest in peace with the stars at their side…comforted by the moon’s full light.
I V
The coolness of the night air…stirs you to open your eyes…gazing upon your rescuer… cautiously eyeing him…you begin to fear him...(trembling)...as your eyes focus on...his tail…and his wings…but, when your eyes meet his…there is a sense of something...something you don’t...fully understand…but some how you feel...a little... safer than you have in many…many years. Your body still aches and you are still screaming...(on the inside)…wanting to be let out…freed from pain…He leans in to kiss your forehead…you know you are safe…and as your eyes close...resting for now...He holds you closer…warming your trembling body with his own…
V
When her frail, battered body stopped shaking...he silently...lets out a sigh of relief…and when the morning light breaks into the sky…sending darkness away…he will not leave her side…she believes in him now…she trusts him…and would undoubtedly expect him to be there…to be her Protector! (As it should have always been!)
He was certain...that she needed him now more than ever, and he’d be there…as the days turned into nights and the nights into days.