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Signed in as:
filler@godaddy.com
This webBLOG: posts, videos, printables, sketches... although not limited too, were designed for the woman -who is like me.
It's for the woman who is tired of fighting endless battles, swearing she is DONE, but is too damn stubborn to give up. It's for the woman who wants to believe that things are going to get better, and she tells herself "They have to"... all the while, the world is resting heavily on her shoulders, making it hard to stand.
This is for the woman who's looking for answers in a child's sock drawer and under his bed. This is for the woman who's looking for faith, hoping to find it tucked away in the corner of a closet or in a forgotten box in the attic. This is for the woman who's ready for happiness, without first having to drown the world away in a drink... or two... or three...
This is for the woman who has been beaten into the ground by life itself, and then, if that wasn't enough, the world set about kicking her while she was down. This is for the woman who has walked the gravel roads -barefoot. For the woman who has screamed at the top of her lungs and realized that not a soul heard her cry out. For the woman who knows how lonely a crowded room can be and how loud silence rings in her ears.
This is for the woman who is ready to heal and transform her life for the better. This is for the woman who is ready to face her fears and conquer her goals. This is for the woman who is ready to stop surviving and start thriving... for the woman who is ready to start living her life...
It's for the woman looking for solid ground to stand on, a foundation to build on. It's for the woman seeking that connection... and all that she hasn't been able to find. It's for the woman who seeks comfort foods and shopping trips to fill an insatiable hole within herself.
I know your story. It's my story too.
But I am more than my story... and YOU are more than your story.
At its heart -its core, my site and all its contents are all about INSPIRED LIVING… it's about learning to Love n' Live your Life! A life that includes making dinners, cleaning the house, raising a family -working from home or full time... all the while just trying to make it work -day in and day out... and keep your sanity too.... Because that's what we do, we do it all... even when we want to throw our hands up and surrender -to the mayhem and chaos consuming us... we find the strength and courage to do what needs to be done.
We get up again... And again... And again.
If this feels like the place you could thrive in... Welcome to my Tribe.
My Background
I was first diagnosed with depression and anxiety at 14. And so began the trials and tribulations of my life. From various therapists and changes in medications... I was never really myself.
Every day was a torment and a struggle -at home and at school. I ran away from home at 16... it was a necessary decision to make... terrifying as it was. I made terrible choices... and I was always in a state of survival. Eventually, I ended up in the psychiatric center for observation. Those were some of the darkest years of my life.
I would eventually go off to college, but I did not finish. I ended up married while 6 months pregnant. I gave up college to raise my son as a stay-at-home mom. Which allowed my then-husband an opportunity to finish with a 4-year degree. While the first few years, things were okay at best... I did what I thought was necessary and made the most of a bad situation.
I gave birth to my second son, and things were not getting better. We were "working" on our relationship... but truthfully, I don't think it would have mattered. It wasn't going to work.
Although, being a stay-at-home mom gave me the opportunity to work on my books and illustrations, I was also working for my then-husband... and this became a very toxic combination. It was acid on what was already an open wound. And eventually it became too much, enough was enough!
It would take nine years of "co-parenting" to realize that it was doing more harm then good to my boys. I left the marriage and the house... but once again I began making bad decisions (in hindsight of course) and ended up having to escape yet another abusive relationship in my life.
I was fortunate enough that my best-friend's husband (my only friend and neighbor too) offered me a new path. A very different path. I accepted the challenge of a new job, never thinking I would ever get it. But I did! And suddenly I was moving three and a half hours south... leaving my youngest son behind. (My oldest had already moved far-far away... just months before I took the job.)
And like that.... suddenly I was 40... I felt like I had gotten nowhere in life. Decades of my life gone, and I had no real motivation to do anything. I was empty... drained... void of life.
I can't say I was starting my life over... because I wasn't. It was just beginning for me. I had never lived on my own. I had never lived outside my county in the last 37 years. I had no idea what I was doing... but I was doing it... little by little... day-by-day. I was starting from scratch... healing traumas and discovering who I was -beneath the layers of what everyone expected me to be.
As of March 2022. I am in the safest place I have ever been. I am loved and all is not lost. Better days... and years are possible. I know this now. I still have daily struggles... the occasional meltdown... or two, and I have a lot of healing to do. But I have a better understanding of who I am, and what I should be doing with my life...
In May of 2023, I married a wonderful man who keeps me grounded and respects me a whole person. There is no criticizing or shaming, only love and support. Proof that things do get better with age... I mean time. ;)
I believe that my purpose is to be a shining light for those looking for guidance -in one form or another. Helping others on their journey through life with my own life experiences. My struggles with depression and anxiety. The daily torment of being an empath. The need to do things a specific way because of my OCD tendencies. The strength it takes to carry all that and be a stay-at-home mother for 15 years, in a toxic environment. And the courage it takes to leave your children behind and start your life... from scratch.
I believe my mission is to guide others, like myself, through life with information, understanding, compassion, inspiration, motivation, encouragement, and positivity.
I’m here to help you… all the while helping myself too.
As they say, "We are stronger together."
Update: March 2024. I tried to go in a new direction. If you have been to my site over the last couple of months you know what I am talking about.
I wanted to focus more on my writing and art, as an author and artist, but here I am again. The carousal has stopped, and I am right back where I started. I feel so exhausted. So defeated. (Continue reading...)
Additional Note:
You may or may not have noticed, but this is not your traditional (WordPress or similar) based blog. This is a website-based blog. So, you won't find ads on top of ads here, or an onslaught of pop-up boxes (well, except for the unavoidable cookie box). Being an empath, they tend to put me in sensory overload. Plus, I found that those platforms were far more tiresome to setup and maintain than people make them out to be. And besides, my intent, the focus of my webBLOG is on content, not making money - or at least not that way. I want my webBLOG to be a quiet n' calm space where you can come to learn more, get helpful ideas or tips, and/or to find inspiration and support when you need it.
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